Pearl 1

It's August 6th and I have not been posting consistently to my blog.
New Rule. I will post every day, and each day there will be 1 pearl of wisdom.
No muss no fuss.

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TODAY'S PEARL OF WISDOM

How to be a Locksmith for Information

Lead with Questions
'Can you tell me about that?'
'What's on your mind?'
'Can you help me understand?'

Lessons from The Bedwetter

Before I share the pearls of wisdom I gleaned from this book, I'm going to comment on the fact that it's been difficult to post consistently for this blog of mine. Maybe to commit to it I need to put myself out there. Put a link to it on Facebook maybe. I need to commit to it.

1) If you want to enjoy these things, make it a treat. Book of Kerry.

2) Meditate on the cool stuff. Chris Farley.

3) It's up to you to set the limits and know what you can and cannot do. Garry Shandling

4) Quality of Life doesn't always mean the most money you can make. Garry Shandling

Secrets # 7, 8, 9 - Get Yourself Out There, Find the Yes, Be A Guru, Enjoy Yourself & Believe In Yourself

1. SECRET 7: Put Yourself Out There, Put Yourself in Front
• Strategies

1) Show up, get noticed, strut your stuff, introduce yourself

2) Maintain your friendships with people you work with (water the plants)

3) Package yourself to appear hot, sexy, in demand

4) Make something sound better than it is

5) Don’t be afraid to sit up front

6) Dress well

7) Look for opportunity everywhere

2. SECRET 8: Find the “Yes”, Pat Yourself On the Back, & Be The Next Guru
• Throw Parties and Invite People Out
• How To Get What You Want

1) Give it a few more days

2) Try Nudging

3) Make sure you make it irresistible

4) Move On

o When People Say No

5) Find Out Why “I appreciate you getting back to me. It would be very helpful to my future efforts if you could tell me why you chose another whatever.”

6) All It Takes Is One Yes

7) If you don’t like the answer look for another way

o How To Stay On Top

8) Write or Say Thank You

9) Make the person feel special for picking you

10) Keep them in the loop on what you’re doing

11) Nice work- don’t stop there. Master the next challenge!

12) Arrive and acquire an understanding of the landscape, politics, interpersonal dynamics, how teamwork is done well. Network. Find out who the powerbrokers are and emulate them.

13) Become a guru. Perpetuate Yourself as a Know It All in that area.

3. SECRET 9: Enjoy Yourself, Believe In Yourself
• Strategies

1) Give yourself at least one day to be giddy about your success. Jump up and down, Rub your hands together in glee, Squeal in delight, Snicker about those who claimed you’d never pull it off

2) Reward Yourself Beautifully – Great deeds deserve great rewards.

3) Accept congratulations and say “Thank You!”

4) Allow for Buyer’s Remorse- Give it 3 months

5) Acknowledge the things you didn’t bargain for but are valuable

6) Rediscover and Reconnect w/ Your Family, Friends, Loved Ones

7) Get rid of friends who don’t let you enjoy your triumphs

8) Decide what matters most and what you will and will not do.

9) Don’t expand work or any activity to take the allotted hours. Try to resolve to leave the office 30 minutes earlier every night and see if you can pull it off.

10) Avoid always doing 2 things at once.

11) Carry notes of assurance or inspiration to remind you to keep things in perspective

12) User a Personal Day to Do Something Personal

13) Go Outdoors and Enjoy Nature

14) Ignore Your Critics

15) Carve out a special place for you to retreat to, to call your own

16) Think about Your Skills As A Toolbox You can Pull Out Anywhere. What Can I Do To Pull This Off?

17) Sleep Late

Secrets #4, 5, 6: Show Passion, Go to Plan B or Z, & Be Sweet

1. SECRET 4: Show Passion, Enthusiasm, and Excitement for What You Want!
2. SECRET 5: When You’ve Asked and They’ve Said No, Try Plan B or Z
• There’s almost always another way to skin the cat, to find something to wear to Atlanta, to pull off what you need to do- you’re just going to have to look around and find it.
• Show Your Gumption (Courage + Energy)

1) The courage part means that you have the guts to take chances, be daring, and not always do as you’re told. “I’m going to think about things in a different way. I’m open to looking at a pair of curtains and seeing a dress.”

• Ways to Get What You Want

1) “Kitchen Sink List” – Write down every possible approach you can think of that will lead you to your goal.

a. Spend a few minutes thinking about each strategy, even those you may be tempted to reject as moronic. Pretend that this is the strategy you must use. How would it work? How would you pull it off?

2) Take a little success and make it bigger

3) Steal a Trick from a Different Arena and Apply It (You can copy a strategy from someone who is successful doing what you hope to do)

4) Turn around a rule and think more creatively.

a. First, you simply write down the basic rule everybody seems to be constantly repeating to you. Then write down a phrase that simply negates the first.

b. Then let yourself go. Allow that second phrase to be the jumping off point for some fresh, bold ideas that occurred to you when you were locked into the rule.

• 2 Things to always keep in mind.

1) Just because it’s never been done doesn’t mean you can’t do it.

2) Just because someone says you shouldn’t doesn’t mean you can’t.

3. SECRET 6: Be the Super Talkative and Friendly Guy, Be the Person W/ Manners Who Smiles and Says Hello
• Be a “Sugar Lips” and ask nicely for what you need or want --Sweet Talk First!
• Flatter them and ask people their opinion
• How To Find Out Something Bad

1) Let them play multiple choice (Was there someone x? or y?)

2) Do not react. Simply nod and say “Thanks for letting me know.”

Secrets #1, 2, 3: Embrace What You Want! Research,Talk, Look Around, Get Away! Don't Wait, Don't Hold Back, Think of Shortcuts

1. SECRET 1: Embrace What You Want

• Women who get what they want are good at knowing what they want. They use phrases like “I’m nuts about it” and “I wouldn’t trade this for anything in the world” and “I’m absolutely in love with what I’m doing”
• It’s a pure sensation and enables you to see what your real desires are. At the bottom of envy is a lavish, all-out sighting of good qualities and registering of awe and amazement at them.
• 3 Little Questions
• In one sentence, what is it that you’re really envying?
• What four words sum up that thing best?
• Of those four words, which appeals to you most?
• Look around and see what you would steal if you could.

2. SECRET 2: Research, Talk to People, Look Around, Go Off the Beaten

o 6 Suggestions

1) PARTICIPATE: Take a class in something that might move you.

2) TALK: Talk to 3 people who have succeeded in the area you’re interested.

3) SURF THE WEB: Get on the Internet and explore the topic

4) SET UP A DATE: Try to get an exploratory interview with someone who knows something.

5) JOURNAL: Write in your journal and write in stream of consciousness style, starting with what you vaguely think you want and letting your words take you to the prize

6) TAPE RECORDER: Talk into a tape recorder about what you think you want and then listen to what you’ve said.

o 4 Signs You’re Into Something

1) You can’t stop thinking about it.

2) You can’t fall asleep when you’re thinking about it.

3) You want to talk to people about it but don’t because you’re afraid someone will steal it.

4) You feel an urge to date it.

o 4 More Steps

1) OLD FLAMES: Look Behind You - Was there once something that made you very happy but got left along the side of the road because you thought you were finished with it or had outgrown it?

2) GET AWAY: Get Out of Town – Sometimes what’s holding you back from seeing what you want are the plans and expectations everybody else has for you.

3) BREAK YOUR ROUTINE: Go off the beaten path – break your routine

4) ARTICULATE & ASK: Ask for Advice (Don’t whine) “I’m feeling a little frustrated these days and I don’t know why. Is there something you think I’m not seeing or taking hold of right now?”

3. SECRET 3: Start Anywhere—Don’t Wait, Don’t Hold Back. Start It Now!
• 4 Principles of Successful Pouncing

1) “All Glory Comes From the Danger to Begin”

2) Eliminate the BullShit steps and Cut To the Chase

3) Find the Person You Need to Meet To Make It Happen and Make Contact

4) If there is a great opportunity within 20 feet, DON’T HOLD BACK. Seize the Day!

• How To Get Your Butt Moving

1) Jump Into the Middle- Skip “step 1” and move to “step 3”

2) Do a test drive or test the water

3) Say Yes/Make a Commitment And Let It Be Your Deadline

• Don’t wait. Look for shortcuts!!!

1) Don’t automatically assume you need training simply because it seems “obvious.

2) Sometimes you don’t have to start at the bottom- Look for back doors and shortcuts!

3) Don’t just speak to the “right” person – speak to the best person (the person with the knowledge and power)!

4) Don’t always swallow “pay your dues.” Sometimes people define arbitrarily, or just based on how long it took them, which doesn’t necessarily have to apply to you.

5) Before you take anyone’s advice to “just wait,” always ask yourself, “What am I waiting for?”

Habit 7 - Preserve the Greatest Asset You Have - You

1. Four Dimensions of Your Nature

a. Physical/PositiveTone/Good Animal – Exercise, Nutrition, Stress Management

b. Social/Emotional/Connectedness/Good Friend/Treat Others – Service, Empathy, Synergy, Intrinsic Security

c. Spiritual/Perspective/A Saint/Contribution – Value Clarification & Commitment, Study & Meditation

d. Mental/Autonomy/Good Craftsman/Develop – Reading, Visualizing, Planning, Writing

2. Personal P/C must be pressed upon until it becomes second nature, until it becomes a kind of healthy addiction. Because it’s at the Center of Influence, no one else can do it for us. We must do it for ourselves.

3. Physical

o Endurance- Aerobic exercise

o Flexibility – Stretching

o Strength – Muscle resistance

4. Spiritual Dimension

o Immersion in great Literature, Music, Nature

5. Mental Dimension

o Proactive people figure out many, many ways to educate themselves. Read good literature –Great Books, Harvard Classics, Autobiographies, Writing

6. Once we are self-aware, we must choose purposes and principles to live by; otherwise the vacuum will be filled, and we lose our self-awareness. People who exist on that level are reacting, unaware of the unique endowments that lie dormant and undeveloped within.

7. To keep progressing, we must learn, commit, and do—learn, commit, and do—learn, commit, and do again.

Habit 6 - Enlarge Your Perspective

1. Synergy means the whole is greater than the sum of its parts
2. The Middle Way means higher, like the apex of the triangle.
3. Sidestep negative energy; you can look for the good in others, as different as it may be to improve your point of view and to enlarge your perspective.